It's Quiet Here, Except For This Song
Tonight, it is quiet here. It's also entirely possible I'll be in bed within the hour, curled up there to watch my favorite TV shows and play on facebook.
I keep alluding to how busy I am, and it's true. I look at the spaces in my day planner and marvel sometimes that there's any place left to write an event in, on certain days. And then the weekends are blessedly white and pristine. A year ago, six months ago even, I would have seen that as evidence of a failed social life. But I don't anymore. I see those days as mine and mine alone, to fill with whatever, and WHOEVER, I deem worthy. Which sounds somewhat snotty and petulant, but I don't intend it that way. It means to me that I've made this conscious decision to be happy, and that I don't have to fill my time with people or events that don't make me happy. If I want to go out with my friends, it's my choice. If I want to sit on my couch alone and watch dvd's, that's my choice, too.
The friends I have gathered around me right now are some of the greatest people I've ever known. The old ones and the new ones. And I say to one of them, quite frequently, I'm choosing to be happy. I'm comfortable with myself, the direction I'm going in, my prospects in all areas. Am I a smiling robot? No. I still have bad days, but I've taught myself to say "tomorrow's another day." I've given myself permission to enjoy my life, for the first time in 37 years. And I'm reaping rewards, every day.
The universe is mine, and I deserve to be happy. Think that, believe that, and it will become true for you in time.
2 Comments:
Quiet weekends are nice. We have about two a month. Keeps us sane.
We seem to be on a parallel path, these days. Just last evening, after the potluck dinner at one friend's house, after trick-or-treating with a boatload of neighborhood kids, and while I was sitting at yet another friend's house in the back, around a bonfire with about 25 friends and their kids, I thought to myself that life just doesn't get better than this.
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