Look Up At The Mountains I Have To Climb

So many Cat Stevens songs play into my memories and my life, mostly because of Andrew, and this one is no different. It may be one of my favorites as well. But sometimes, his spirit sustains me in times of trouble, and I keep fighting knowing that he wouldn't let me stop if he were here now.

I was greeted this morning, the first Monday back from vacation, by the second letter in two weeks time detailing alleged incompetence and impropriety on my part. It's all mudslinging, all diversion, but, the constant barrage of negativity I'm operating under right now begins to wear on the psyche. However, I had a wonderful conversation with a new friend this evening, who called me from the airport on his way to a business trip. Checking in on my Monday, and letting me, somewhat calmly because he's new, relay this recent attack on my credibility and ability to perform my job. And he was encouraging and supportive, mostly in that he didn't offer advice or action, just listened, and extended some empathy.

And I thought of this song, about struggle and movement and greeting adversity to come out balanced and content. This, too, shall pass, this drama, this constant barrage of shrapnel to my professionalism. Calm will win out over crazy, I hope. But damn, some days it just drains me.

Miles from nowhere,
Guess I'll take my time, oh yeah,
To reach there.
Look up at the mountain I have to climb,
Oh yeah,
To reach there.
Lord my body has been a good friend,
But I won't need it when I reach the end...

Miles from Nowhere - Cat Stevens

MP3 File